Places to Find a Great Pen Pal

It's been about two years since I started my pen pal journey, and I swear I am not addicted to it at all. It started out so innocently, 5 pen pals here, add another 5 there, until today I have 35 pen pals.

Yes, I do write to them all, and mostly I remember what it is that we are talking about.

Many people ask me, "Tami, where do you find your pen pals?" And when I tell them, they look at me with this look of complete bewilderment because they have never heard of the places that I am talking about. So I thought for the addicts out there that want more, or want to start pen palling (doesn't that word look silly?) I'd help you out with a few links.

The first place I got my pen pals was on Swap-Bot. When you're on this site you are able to find interesting swaps that are not pen pal related, and also swaps that will have you swap a letter with one person. Hopefully this person and you will click and they will write you back. You will send a letter to one person, and another person will send a letter to you. So you have the opportunity to have two pen pals if you'd like. The only downside is that you must search the listings for pen pal related swaps, but when you find them, it's well worth it.

Another site you can find great pen pals is You place an ad describing yourself and people inbox you with responses. It's a great system. While you're there, you can go to their main page and order some stationary to start writing your letters. The only downside I've found on this site is that if you want to keep your ad going and get some results on a regular basis you need to place your ad again. It's tedious, but it's doable.

There are plenty of Facebook groups that you can find and join. My favorites are Snail Mail Pen Pals Ladies Only which you have to join and be approved. The approval status is relatively quick. You can do one of two things:

  1. Sit around a lurk to see if you find someone that posts for a pen friend that seems interesting to you.
  2. Do a quick intro right away and ask for pen friends.

The only thing that bugs me a bit, but I have learned to get over it, is the fact that most pen friends want to be your "friend" on Facebook. I've been trying to weed my list down for a while, and adding pen friends immediately after they've asked if they want to be pals is a little daunting, especially if you are one to post things that may be not quite PC.

My other favorite Facebook group is Lots of Crazy Pen Pals (No Men). They are a group of very active pen pals. If you're not one for a LOT of notifications, you may want to turn them off for this group. It is very well managed and one person a day runs the show by keeping the girls talking about things like, "Did you get mail today?" or "What's for dinner?" and other topics that keep the group talking. I think my favorite thing that they do are the word games. You'll have to join to find out what games they play, I can't give you all the information first.

This group also has people that want to be your Facebook friend right off the bat, but like I said, I've gotten used to it. Could I hit the decline button - of course, But I've always had a problem with saying no to people. So another Facebook friend it is.

How do you find your pen pals? Please leave a comment below, I'd love to find some more places to look.

Huggles to all, 


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